What Did Cutting My Hair Mean To Me?

EOS5DMarkIII_3204

What did cutting my hair mean to me?

I used hair as a crutch. It was my support. It was confirmation that I was beautiful. On September 29th, I decided to do away with it. Yes, guys I made the decision to cut off my hair. It was something that I’ve always wanted to do. I was frustrated with my 4C mane and how much maintenance it required, and quite frankly I wanted a change. I decided that if I cut my hair and dyed it, it would be “bomb”. So that’s exactly what I did. I had no real vision of what I wanted I just knew that I wanted a new look. So here we go.

I chopped it all off and my first reaction was tears. I looked at my boyfriend while driving and instantly burst into tears. What have I just done I thought to myself? I can’t believe I really went through with this. Why did no one talk me out of this? Wow I’m going to have to wear makeup everyday so everyone knows I’m a girl. These were the thoughts that ran through my mind on the drive home. Thank god, I had Vaughn there to give me the support I needed. He reassured me that I was beautiful and had nothing but positive feedback on my new look. His reaction made me feel so much better about this cut.

I said all that to say I cried because this was something new and completely out of my comfort zone. My hair wasn’t super long to begin with but I learned to love my kinky fro. So, seeing something contrary of that threw me off of my game. I didn’t know how to feel at first because I knew that I wouldn’t be able to wear my weaves. I had to learn to appreciate my natural beauty. I could no longer hide behind society’s perceived beauty ideal, I had to create and live in my own. I had to realize that hair didn’t define beauty, and for me to really believe that I had to experience it.

So again, I ask what did cutting my hair mean to me? It meant change, it meant being uncomfortable and it meant owning my beauty. Now here I am, feeling more beautiful than ever and loving the decision I made.

XX

Kaylyn

6 comments

  1. This right here is helping me to make that decision of cutting my hair or changing my style. I’ve had locs for so long, so I don’t remember how I look without them. This was very inspiring and beautiful! 😁

    Liked by 2 people

  2. You my niece have always been beautiful just gorgeous. I’m so extremely happy that you see what I and the rest of the world have always seen. Your outer beauty a match to your inner beauty. This coming from your beautiful fully loc’s auntie lol. Stay beautiful smooches

    Liked by 2 people

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